Man films himself in the middle of a panic attack 'to prove anxiety is a real illness'

Casey Cahill, 27, from Kentucky, posted the harrowing footage on YouTube

Victoria Richards
Thursday 11 June 2015 14:05 BST
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Casey Cahill posted footage of himself shaking and crying
Casey Cahill posted footage of himself shaking and crying (YouTube/Throw Away)

A man took the brave step of filming himself in the middle of a panic attack and then posting it online to prove that anxiety disorders are real.

Casey Cahill, 27, from Kentucky, shared footage of himself shaking, crying and sweating as he experienced an episode of extreme anxiety.

He has suffered from the condition for 12 years, and said that he wanted to show the world just how harrowing and debilitating it could be.

In the clip, which was posted to YouTube, Mr Cahill says: "I recently had a really bad panic attack. And I have them from time to time, more than some people should - more than anybody should."

Mr Cahill, who has suffered since he was 15, can be seen bowing his head and swearing. He also describes some of the physical symptoms he is experiencing in the middle of his attack.

"My brain is on fire, right now," he says. "I feel like I'm going to pass out, my emotions are crazy, obviously. I'm having crazy thoughts in my head."

Mr Cahill has suffered from panic attacks since he was 15 (YouTube/Throw Away)

Mr Cahill explains that he can't get through an episode like this on his own. "I've always been the type of person who says, "You've got to man up, force your way through it", but it would be like telling a blind person to see," he says. "I can't do anything about this."

And he believes that his symptoms may have resurfaced due to the stress of taking on a new, full-time job.

"The reason this is so bad right now is because I recently had to start working full-time around people who are just going to judge me," he says. "People in society don't understand. I'll probably stop taking my medicine, though I know that's not what you should do."

He also explains his motivation for sharing the deeply personal clip. "I just wanted to make this video to show to myself that this is what it's like when you don't try to help yourself - when you think you can do it on your own.

"I just wanted to make this video to show that this is real, okay? This is real."

He told The Mighty that when he was a teenager he had called the emergency services.

"When I was 15, I dialed 911 thinking I was having a heart attack after looking up my symptoms online," he said.

He then decided to share his suffering with the world because he wanted others to know that they weren't alone.

“A few weeks ago, I was looking on YouTube for similar videos, hoping I could find something that made me feel like I wasn’t alone, that I wasn’t going crazy,” he explained.

“Unfortunately, everything I found seemed pretty ‘mild’ compared to how I felt. So I’m recording myself to help and connect with people who feel like I did a few weeks earlier. You aren’t alone.”

Mr Cahill has been swamped with support since the video was posted to Reddit.

One user said: "That's EXACTLY what I look like and sound like when having a panic attack. Pure discomfort."

They added: "It's nice to know that other men cry too. I cry a lot during fits of anxiety and depression and I always feel very "weak" for doing so."

If you're in the UK and need help, contact The Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 or email jo@samaritans.org.

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