The Strictly contestants are not dancing on a level floor – I’m firmly in the camp of the underdogs

As someone whose training stopped aged seven, I know that thanks to a certain natural bendiness I can make some extraordinary moves, but I have no musical ability whatsoever and cannot follow choreography to save my life

I’ve been struggling with Strictly this year, ever since my mate Anneka Rice left in week three.

Week three is movie week on the Strictly calendar and Anneka and her partner (last year’s champ) Kevin Clifton gave us a Kill Bill-themed cha-cha. Despite having executed a gorgeous pink-frocked waltz the previous week and giving Uma Thurman a run for her money in leggy loveliness, this just wasn’t Anneka’s dance. She clod-hopped out, grinning gamely but knowing deep down she was doomed.

Anneka is untrained, and although she’s physically in the best nick of anyone I know, she has never danced in a professional capacity in her life. She didn’t go to theatre school and she has certainly never appeared dancing on the West End stage. Some of the other contestants (both past and present) have, because I’ve seen them.